New Testingstan

Shroom Man 777 wrote:its because he is insecure and feels really bad about whatever perceived shortcomings he has and so because of these structural instabilities in his persona all these flaws and imbalances and un-ideal things in his life makes his personality hinges creak very loudly

Maybe something like that.

How the hell do you cure that though? It's a vicious cycle. You're insecure because you get rejected, you get rejected (indirectly) because you're insecure.

RyanThunder wrote:

Shroom Man 777 wrote:its because he is insecure and feels really bad about whatever perceived shortcomings he has and so because of these structural instabilities in his persona all these flaws and imbalances and un-ideal things in his life makes his personality hinges creak very loudly

Maybe something like that.

How the hell do you cure that though? It's a vicious cycle. You're insecure because you get rejected, you get rejected (indirectly) because you're insecure.

have you considered getting a hobby

I have a few hobbies.

jacking off to porn and watching tv aren't hobbies

I dance, I write music, draw shit, and I occasionally play warhammer 40K.

Oh, and I practice muay thai with some friends once a week.

I hate TV.

I've been steadily employed by a pretty large charity for years.

so basically nothing that really makes you get outside and meet people who aren't fatties or insecure man-childs

We do plenty of shit outside.

a hobby is good advice

also do some critical examination of your actions and attitudes, including thinking about how other people (particularly women) could interpret them especially if they don't know you well

another good idea is read some stuff about how dating is from a woman's perspective, not "how to snag perfect guy" crap but "how culture and male privilege dramatically impact the different ways that a man and woman see the exact same situation"

finally grow a thicker skin and don't flip out if someone does something you don't like

edit: do not tell people about warhammer

Having a hobby means you can be good at something besides work that you can talk to normal people about and build confidence. Which means you have something to talk to chicks about. Instead of being a fatty sperging nerd who can't talk about anything but 40k and comes off as being desperate to get laid.

he did say muay thai


you just need to... feel better about yourself as a person

even if its from nerd things it doesn't matter

you just need to.... hate yourself less

because deep down its not about how others see you

its about how you see you

it is from there that comes the way others treat you

or some shit

if you become fulfilled with your things, even if they are niches others might not dig, but that fulfillment makes you feel better and others see the betterment in your temperament

they observe the self-betterment of your ego and shit

(which manifests in an outward appearance of you not giving a fuck about insignificant slights because you truly don't give a fuck about insignificant slights because your betterments and fulfillments and achievements and shits make you feel good about yourself so puny shit won't threaten you anymore or discomfort you)

then, well, i guess good shit comes from that

or at least you'll feel less bad

and that will be a huge fucking change and from that point there will be more options available to you


and will also change how people see you and thus interact with you and shits and all sorts of chain reaction bullshit

^^^^^

well

technically muay thai counts but idk if it helps much with talking to normal people

what benefit could there be to something that boosts your self control and confidence

it helps that my own martial arts experience was less of a "class" setting and more of a buncha dudes just hanging out and bullshitting around and occasionally drinking and barbecuing right after training right on the training ground


yes, ryan, you should bring booze and raw meat and charcoal to your muay thai training area during sundays after the workout so the masters and stuff can get drunk and eat and stuff

this reminds me of how the other saturday it was our grandmaster's birthday so we got some cake and pork and pasta and chicken and stuff and had ate after training

nobody brought a cake knife so one of the masters just pulled out a balisong and handed it to one of the girls so she could carve the cake

the cake had candles that re-ignited so our grandmaster had to keep on blowing at his candles while we all lol'ed

but then his radio blurbed so he had to report to the town hall or something to answer some crime in progress thing that his subordinates couldn't something

then these two korean dudes gave him an awesome gift

a sword

good tiems

lol for his birthday he got a sword and was able to beat up some criminals

Zod wrote:so basically nothing that really makes you get outside and meet people who aren't fatties or insecure man-childs

I prefer doing activities on my own. I have friends, but I only like interacting with them at school and when we go out to dinner. Going to a movie? I want to do it alone.

Zod wrote:jacking off to porn and watching tv aren't hobbies

Film criticism certainly is if you write about it and it reaches a large audience.

Losonti Tokash wrote:what benefit could there be to something that boosts your self control and confidence

i'm just saying martial arts isn't something you tend to bring up in casual conversation

My filipino buddy who taught me most of the muay thai stuff i know

he's trying to harden his shins by tapping them with arnis sticks

i tried it and instantly got hilariously large bruises. the discolouration lasted for like 3 weeks

so i said I'd start with a pool noodle and work up from there

Zod wrote:

Losonti Tokash wrote:what benefit could there be to something that boosts your self control and confidence

i'm just saying martial arts isn't something you tend to bring up in casual conversation

also, it really depends on your target audience

i know i am shit in normal conversations

but around total dorks and nerds, who are glourious people, we have lots of lols

and so it's great this co-worker chick and i talk about terribel movies

and really if you manage to find peoples who are of the same interests then you won't have to force yourself to whatever is "casual"

and you'll be happies

^________________^

RyanThunder wrote:My filipino buddy who taught me most of the muay thai stuff i know

he's trying to harden his shins by tapping them with arnis sticks

i tried it and instantly got hilariously large bruises. the discolouration lasted for like 3 weeks

so i said I'd start with a pool noodle and work up from there

there is a filipino martial arts called yaw yan, a mean ass kickboxing thing, that also does that

they want to deaden shin nerves to make their shin blows badasser

idk, some of the older practitioners who retire end up with really messed up legs

there's a reason "soft" martial arts like win chung aren't really into the repeatedly hit hard things to whatever nerves/harden bodyparts/whatev

^^^^part of why i like judo so much is because it seems elegant compared to other martial arts, in as much as you can apply that word to the practice of throwing people around a room

Zod wrote:

Losonti Tokash wrote:what benefit could there be to something that boosts your self control and confidence

i'm just saying martial arts isn't something you tend to bring up in casual conversation

whatevs man people love it when i talk about joint locks and how to safely transfer energy out of your fist into someone's face

yeah folks generally find it p.cool

if i ever went on a first date i'd talk about the two things i love talking about most

politics and religion

LOL

Good god you're even worse than me. I did end up explaining what socialism was to a girl but that was because she asked after we walked past the socialist club the other day.

did say it was capitalism but nicer?

Nah I gave her the 30 second version in my usual neutral tone.

i.e. State controls all industry and we control the state, as opposed to capitalism where the rich control all industry and we feebly attempt to control the state.