Lament 2: Cry Harder

[Losonti Tokash]

sorry you're dissappointed man

but there ARE other worthwhile things to do than just being in the army

[Darksi4190]

Even if I do find something worthwhile to do with my life, which really seems like a longshot right now, I'll never be able to prove myself in that way. All my friends who've served, Dave Jake, Aaron, i'll always be inferior to all of them, no matter what I do, and i'm not sure I can accept that.

[evilsoup]

god I just want to reach through my laptop screen and punch you right now

[Shroom Man 777]

very well played darski

[Darksi4190]

what?

[Crazedwraith]

ok, the idea behind saying there are other worthwhile things to do, is that because they are as worthwhile as being in the army, the fact you're doing them and not being in army does not mean you are inferior to those people who have been in the army.

different but equal

[Shroom Man 777]

sorry, but idk, this "i can't join the army can't prove myself to friends a b c and d" seems so cheesy and cliche'd that for a moment i thought chains were being yanked and legs were being pulled

sounded like a line straight from captain america when chris evans was trying to join the smarmy

[Darksi4190]

no, i'm 100% serious.

[Shroom Man 777]

well, idk how to put it, but this whole idea of "must be army or else worthless to macho soldier sam friends" is preposterous

and listen to yourself

you wanted to be in the army, you wanted to be a tough soldier doing soldiery things

but listen to yourself

you sound... ugh

even if you don't get into the army, if you at least get your brain to be tough so at the face of slight discouragements you won't collapse, then you wouldn't BE this way

because with your current attitude, even if you had a musculoid body, if you did get into the army's physical requirements, it sounds like you'd end up sulking after the first harsh word your drill sergeant hurls at you

(arguably your attitude would be different if you were beefcake bob mike manmeat mckenzie with awesome physical prowess kung fu grip, but still)

come on

you want to be in the military sooo bad yet listen to yourself

an accountant would be better able to handle disappointment than this

if you want to be "soldier worthy" or whatever, you need to fix this... thing

because even if you don't become a soldier, if at least you improve your mindset or change your brain, you'd still end up being mentally and emotionally tougher/stabler than you are now



your need for constant validation from macho friends is actually an impediment to your development of soldierly qualities, or other similarly "tough" qualities or even non-tough qualities (it would still get in the way if, for example, you wanted to be a baker)

get off it

[evilsoup]

holy shit, was it you who said you wanted to be a teacher? Because I literally cannot think of a more worthwhile career than that.

[Losonti Tokash]

Even if I do find something worthwhile to do with my life, which really seems like a longshot right now, I'll never be able to prove myself in that way. All my friends who've served, Dave Jake, Aaron, i'll always be inferior to all of them, no matter what I do, and i'm not sure I can accept that.

i want you to read this out loud and think about whether this is reasonable, especially in light of other people on this board who have never served in the military but do important, worthwhile work

or if you think that you'll always be inferior to my uncle who served in the air force but is now a drug addict notable for such things as calling the cops on his son because the son stole his crack pipe

[Shroom Man 777]

god I just want to reach through my laptop screen and punch you right now

There are no fingerprints
Deep under water
Nothing to tie one to a crime
And if you seek vengeance
All you need are instruments of pain


http://youtube.com/watch?v=whxehyRH8Ec

[Djinnkitty83]

Sweet Jesus, darkski's turned this thread into an after-school special.

I'll quickly lay your 'ideal' life out for you, running under the assumption that what you're typing here is actually what you feel constitutes living a worthy and complete life:

You get in the armed forces with your friends. You compare slightly favourably to them in training, get recognition and promotion just that bit faster, hooray. Maybe you guys eventually get sent off to war, maybe one or more of your buddies dies, more likely than not circumstance and personal tastes dictate that a majority of you guys will go off in different directions in life, your entire social interaction maybe a single conversation a year, if that. You complete your time in the military, maybe with a few more acquired chronic health problems, maybe wrestling with medical debt due to trouble with getting VA benefits, maybe trying to get into school. But it was all worth it, right? Because you got in, did your time, and proved you weren't inferior to your buddies.

Then you look back and make a stunning realization: You're not at all happy or fulfilled.

Because you're being an idiot and defining your happiness by validation from others, which has worked all of never in the history of human psychology.

For fuck's sake, go volunteer at an animal shelter if you're this desperate for validation, at least then you're genuinely helping those in need, and the only judgement you'll get from them is fawning adoration and gratefulness.

[Losonti Tokash]

from the dogs, anyway

the cats may show their favor by allowing their disdain to fall upon you

[Djinnkitty83]

from the dogs, anyway

the cats may show their favor by allowing their disdain to fall upon you

A moment of seriousness: Shelter cats are some of the most desperately affectionate things in existence, generally speaking. Cats are just as social, and need pretty much as much socialization as dogs, even if they aren't quite as excitable about it. Most cats that have come through the shelters I've volunteered at have been severely neglected and it shows. The whole 'social-dog-aloof-cat' stereotype melts away after the second or third affectionate-kitty-gang-tackle.

[Sandman]

The mental image from that gave me this warm fuzzy feeling that can only expressed as 'aww' at the kitty-tackle, followed suddenly by overwhelming amounts of loathing towards those who put them into such a desperate situation to begin with.

[Djinnkitty83]

For a while I worked with a neglected, older cat who had gone both blind and deaf. Basically you had to guide it to food and water, and remind it that other entities existed. It was the happiest cat in the world so long as it was being touched in some way, but could do pretty much nothing else. Thankfully it eventually got a family with a retired couple.

[Djinnkitty83]

I've always had a soft spot for the less stereotypically likable animals. Anyone can adore a fuzzy little kitten or a happy, wag-tail doggy. No one ever takes the time, however, to reassure the three-legged dog in the back whose face is half covered in scar tissue and has a chronic drooling problem thanks to misaligned teeth, or the neglected cat who's developed severe neuroses and has compulsively gnawed his forearms until they're nothing but masses of scaley, bald skin.

[Sandman]

My uncle recently adopted a three-legged dog. I always admire those who can take in such animals and care for them, since it's always a little more difficult and requires a bit more attention than adopting a fully-healthy dog, and it shows a lot of empathy for those who happen to be suffering or less fortunate.

[Losonti Tokash]

[Darksi4190]

I just want to thank you guys for the encouragement. I'm currently weening myself off of my Effexor, and it's causing some pretty fucked up mood swings. Yeah i'm bummed that I probably won't be able to enlist, but i'm not that worried about it honestly.

[Nietzslime]

my week:

1. doctor telling me my blood tested positive for hiv

2. doctor telling me it was probably a false positive and i probably don't have hiv

3. realizing how out-of-my-depth i am in my classes (it's a lot)

4. lots of racism

all in all there are aspects of my life i could improve upon

[Oxymoron]

re shelter animal : we've had a shelter cat for more than 13 years now, and I can tell you, WE are the one keeping him company - the thing has abandonment issues...

[Darksi4190]

So i've made a decision about the army thing. I've still got my cardiologist appointment on the 28th of november, i'll see if I can get a note from him certifying that my heart is healthy enough to survive bootcamp, then i'll go back to the recruiter and see if that makes a difference. If not, I guess i'll have to find some other way to pay for school.

[Losonti Tokash]

if you're absolutely determined to join, does your university have an rotc program