New Testingstan

Infinity Biscuit wrote:There's a difference between a word being reclaimed by the group it was used to hurt and it continuing to be used by those to whom it wasn't directed.

Not really. It's actually pretty controversial in the black community with growing numbers of people saying the word should be dropped altogether.

And it should be their decision, not ours, since the word affects them, not us. Same as straight people shouldn't use hetero-/cissexist language, but if those it was directed at wish to reclaim it, that's their decision.

I just think if you want someone to not use a word you shouldn't use it yourself, if for no other reason than it causes confusion among some. This isn't me saying "waa they can use it why can't I?", it's more of saying "if it's really that hurtful, then you shouldn't use it either."

Because having a word thrown at you as a direct reminder of the power imbalance and discrimination in society feels significantly different than using it yourself. It's the difference between having a police officer strip you naked vs taking your own clothes off, or having someone leak out your secrets vs you confessing them.

There are some issues with it, like from my standpoint while I use the word queer to identify myself and like it, there are several other slurs that others are reclaiming that make me uncomfortable, some significantly. But that's something for us to figure out on our own since the words are used to hurt us. Just the same as I'm never going to try to influence how the black community in America reclaims or doesn't reclaim words used to hurt them.

Leaving that part of the debate out of the issue, because there are significant unaddressed issues on both sides that come from the fact that cultures do not exist as monolithic entities and also that they interact...

One thing I miss from the ASVS days were the facts that I remember that place being one of the few places where you could get a well crafted tirade. In these days of increasingly offensive profanity, a lot of the old creativity I remember from my grandfather and his generation seems to have gotten lost. I still remember my uncle explaining not only how to craft a proper profanity-laced chewing out, but why and when to use them, and the hilarious fact that if you do it right, you don't actually need to use profanity.

For example (coming up with this clinically is a bit harder than you'd think, throw in the fact that I'm going to pains to leave it completely devoid of anything directly offensive or targeted at the subject):

"Jay-SUS CHRIST on a crutch carrying a pogo-stick down Main Street looking for some Granny Smith apples to buy, that was one of the stupidest things I've ever seen! From where on God's green earth did you possibly get the idea that there might even be a chance that that even raised itself to the level of being a BAD idea? Did you even consider what you are doing for longer than it takes a golden retriever to get distracted by a bouncing ball? There are fruit flies living in South America who've got enough life experience to know that was a mistake. If you had the brains necessary to fall out of your bed in the morning, you'd know that [INSERT LESSON HERE]."

The goal is to A) get people's attention, B) make the rant memorable, C) educate the rantee and (optionally) those around who might make the same mistake. The keys, as my uncle related them, were timing, imagery, absurdity and tone.