New Testingstan

Thats the general attitude here though.

You know

France is the first or second country in Europe with the highest fertility rate


we make lots of babies here

they must come from somewhere, right ?


I'd like to think that's because we are superior or something something healthcare

but at its roots it's simply because our policies encourage people having lots of kids

among other things : people who have lots of kids pay proportionally less taxes on their incomes, and the more children a woman has, the sooner they can reach Retirement at full pension rate (at least that was true a while ago, I dunno if it's still in effect)

plus there's the Family Aids


So basically some people do babies for the monies

I just had a discussion with my mother about that

and it seem what I just said above is a load of bullshit, and that I was inadvertently spouting far-right arguments against Family Aids

starku wrote:Then you realise all that is to out breed black people and it's not so rosy

Just like in au

The thing is, we don't have official statistics about it (they would be illegal), but it's wildly suspected that the main cause of this "fertility spike" are the immigrant populations.

Of course, as it can't be proven, that's just speculations.

I think the big difference that I've noticed is people who were prepared mentally for having children v those who weren't.

This isn't planned v unplanned.

This is people who can recognise what a massive commitment having a kid is, the personal, financial and other sacrifices that need to be made, the kind of heavy lifting you'll have to do to bring that kid through everything etc versus the people who shit out a kid because they want to feel unconditional love or because they think it's the thing they're meant to be doing or worse, they think that it's going to be easy.

Man I don't remember what I thought but we get about 700$ a month from the Province and the Feds for the kids. That's quite the incentive.

Rabid, what do you mean by its illegal to keep stats?

We have pretty harsh laws against Discrimination

among other things, the State can't put an "ethnicity" over people's head

you're either a French Citizen, or you're not

there's no "French Citizen of 2nd Generation from a family of North African Descent" or some crap like that

so it means there's no statistic that exist on the subject I talked about



Edit : not for the worst, in my opinion...

this may give more details : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_righ ... rimination

As Ando says, unplanned parenthood(particularly when you're in your early twenties like I was) is very much a sink or swim deal. For me it was this massive whack of 'I can't believe society entrusts me with a defenceless person when I know that I'm hopelessly disorganised and have killed my job prospect by dropping out of uni for this.' Compound this with the fact that all of my family lived elsewhere in the country and so support from them was largely verbal, though I have my dad to thank for being something of a financial crutch when needed and saving me from serious grief a few times. That last point is also poignant; I've died a little inside everytime I've had to ask him for help with money, as it highlights truly how unprepared I was for the social and fiscal responsibility that is raising a child.

I'm hoping by the time I've figured out how to be in a committed relationship with another adult, I've figured myself out enough to not be so bad at being a parent too. Plus I'm lucky in that my own parents will (touch wood) be around to help, like my grandmothers were for my parents. Multi-generational households make so much more sense to me, but I grew up in one so bias lol.

But I'm probably being naive about my own preparedness I imagine.

Almost certainly are. Sometimes I wish we did the multi generation thing but I can't stand my wife's parents and would prefer not to live with mine because mom and I have nothing in common.

I used to live in a multi generational household. My immediate family, plus Mum's two siblings, and grandma. Seven people with three bedrooms and a caravan parked out the front.

It would have weird moment like my Dad going "This is my house, and therefore you'll do as I say." I came back with "Isn't it Grandma's house?" He did NOT like that.

Yeah, my wife and I are isolated from ANY family support (aside from fiscal, which as Timmy says, just kills you).

Not having anyone to do emergency daycare, babysitting or anything at all, really makes it harder.

It especially makes it harder not to punch relatives who do have this and utilise / abuse it (in one case the grandparents take the kids for 5 days and 4 nights a week EVERY WEEK) and then complain about how hard it is and how much daycare costs for the solitary day a week they actually pay for it.

Fucking children. These idiots are the true form of "babies having babies".

I'm pretty much never going to be able to have kids of my own, and I've come to terms with that.

My sister had to deal with an unplanned pregnancy and raising a child on her own, and seeing that and how much it changes your life, there's no way I could put myself through that.

Add to that the fact that I'm physically incapable of being a mom, and freezing my spunk is prohibitively expensive.

Never gonna happen.

And If I really wanted to do so down the line, i.e. if I find myself in a stable living situation with another woman, I'd adopt.

You ever wake up in the middle of the night and have a raging hard on and you know you were having a dream about sex so you think you must be horny and start to rub one out only to realize the reason you woke up was because you're incredibly thirsty?

Yeah, me neither.

Not buying it buddy.

so damn thirsty

three large glasses of water later and i'm not satisfied

It must be all that jerkin' it.

You know, there are some things that you just don't have to share with people on the internet.

Too damn long.

So I started with a new psychologist today and feel tonnes better. Gonna work on shit I never have; bitterness with the army and how to turn off the killer, anger over being abandoned by them, the bitterness over the giant lie.

If someone ever tells you soldiers knew what they were in for when they enlisted, you have my permission to punch them really hard in the middle of the face.

Because you don't. I'm 34 and I realized it this week.

Good luck, Aaron.

Oxymoron wrote:Good luck, Aaron.

+1

Aaron wrote: If someone ever tells you soldiers knew what they were in for when they enlisted, you have my permission to punch them really hard in the middle of the face.

Because you don't. I'm 34 and I realized it this week.

Will do. Repeatedly.

Thanks guys, I feel optimism for the first time in a while.